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Definition of Carpy


Golden Paws

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With the outbreak of Corona Virus and most of us in social isolation or exclusion from fishing, we need something to cheer us up and keep the grey stuff ticking over. "Carpy" is a word often used but hasn't really been defined.......until now! Here is my list of things required to be considered "Carpy"

 

Driving in a car with the registration C4 RPY. The ultimate!

 

Have a beard, the bigger and bushier the better! Those long sessions don't leave time for showers or other types of "man grooming" than non anglers (or poofs as they are sometimes known) seem to think is necessary. Oh, and having an ear piercing so large you can push your finger through it.

 

Drinking out of a cup that should carry a public health warning as it hasn't seen the washing up bowl since last Christmas. Etching words like "bacteria" and "salmonella" on the grime built up on the back of your tea spoon and photographing it and putting it on instagram.

 

A photo of your kettle boiling on the stove in the pitch black on the same Site, it's almost compulsory.

 

Speaking phrases that non anglers have no idea what you are talking about. "Lovely times", "buzzing", "happy days "and other toe curling terms are compulsory if writing in one of the Carp comics.

 

Talk to your non-angling mates about your all consuming hobby in a way that totally bamboozles them. "Yea, I caught Mary at 25 wraps on a popped up tiger on a stiffy" will have most people scratching their heads.

 

We have already established that some anglers regard personal hygiene as optional. Going into work the next day after rolling some bait with Monster Crab flavouring will have you in self isolation in the canteen even before the outbreak of Corona Virus.

 

Drive a car that could be classified as a "shed". Used builder vans or estates that have used nets and slings as well as all that bait, "just in case they're 'aving it" are common in fishing vehicles that no members of the family will dare to venture in.

 

Be in a Zombie like state at work the next day after an overnighter. You think that you're blagging it but the eyes like organ stops and dense utterings to even simple questions show that you should have waited until Friday night.

 

You've (rightly) been banned from cooking hemp in the kitchen as it stinks the house out, so what do you do? Buy a Baby Burco and cook it in the garden and [censored] off the neighbours off as well.

 

You went through the motions as school, doing just enough to scrape a few O levels together so at least you could get a job and pay for your fishing gear. Your knowledge of nutrition needed for fish growth, protein absorption rates and stimulation for cyprinid preoccupation levels show that a degree in Science wasn't beyond you.

 

I must have missed a few, any more takers?

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Lol good stuff, being a 90's kind of guy beards have never appealed it's ok to have the grizzly beard look but it needs a certain amount of gray in it, see Des Taylor now that's a carpy beard. you can see some guys use their beard as a pointing device, lol.

Did give myself food poisoning once when out for a few days, one of the pitfalls of going out in the hot summer trust me there is a big difference between a bad belly and food poisoning.

All my cars apart the latest and work cars have come out of a scrap yard or parts breakers, some of the motors i have MOTed makes a mockery out of the whole MOT thing, the last one i had was starting to have more boxed off interior switches that working ones. 

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I've not done much that is 'carpy', other than the going into work straight from an overnighter, but I did have showers at work, and always spare clean clothes there.

My cup, that gets washed, can't be dealing with caffeine or tannin stains, and I'd much rather not get funny guts.

 

The beard thing, not for me, a weeks growth of stubble is about my limit, and it is probably 20 years since I last wore any of my earrings, although I know the holes haven't closed up.

 

Must admit my car is a tip though, normally got my bedchair stored in there, but is full of dog hair where Sky sits in the back.

 

Oh I lie, I may have proper carpy roughing it:

 

11 hours ago, Golden Paws said:

With the outbreak of Corona Virus and most of us in social isolation or exclusion from fishing, we need something to cheer us up and keep the grey stuff ticking over. "Carpy" is a word often used but hasn't really been defined.......until now! Here is my list of things required to be considered "Carpy"

 

 

Driving in a car with the registration C4 RPY. The ultimate!

 

 

Have a beard, the bigger and bushier the better! Those long sessions don't leave time for showers or other types of "man grooming" than non anglers (or poofs as they are sometimes known) seem to think is necessary. Oh, and having an ear piercing so large you can push your finger through it.

 

 

Drinking out of a cup that should carry a public health warning as it hasn't seen the washing up bowl since last Christmas. Etching words like "bacteria" and "salmonella" on the grime built up on the back of your tea spoon and photographing it and putting it on instagram.

 

A photo of your kettle boiling on the stove in the pitch black on the same Site, it's almost compulsory.

 

 

Speaking phrases that non anglers have no idea what you are talking about. "Lovely times", "buzzing", "happy days "and other toe curling terms are compulsory if writing in one of the Carp comics.

 

 

Talk to your non-angling mates about your all consuming hobby in a way that totally bamboozles them. "Yea, I caught Mary at 25 wraps on a popped up tiger on a stiffy" will have most people scratching their heads.

 

 

We have already established that some anglers regard personal hygiene as optional. Going into work the next day after rolling some bait with Monster Crab flavouring will have you in self isolation in the canteen even before the outbreak of Corona Virus.

 

 

Drive a car that could be classified as a "shed". Used builder vans or estates that have used nets and slings as well as all that bait, "just in case they're 'aving it" are common in fishing vehicles that no members of the family will dare to venture in.

 

 

Be in a Zombie like state at work the next day after an overnighter. You think that you're blagging it but the eyes like organ stops and dense utterings to even simple questions show that you should have waited until Friday night.

 

 

You've (rightly) been banned from cooking hemp in the kitchen as it stinks the house out, so what do you do? Buy a Baby Burco and cook it in the garden and [censored] off the neighbours off as well.

 

 

You went through the motions as school, doing just enough to scrape a few O levels together so at least you could get a job and pay for your fishing gear. Your knowledge of nutrition needed for fish growth, protein absorption rates and stimulation for cyprinid preoccupation levels show that a degree in Science wasn't beyond you.

 

 

I must have missed a few, any more takers?

 

image.jpeg

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13 hours ago, Golden Paws said:

We have already established that some anglers regard personal hygiene as optional. Going into work the next day after rolling some bait with Monster Crab flavouring will have you in self isolation in the canteen even before the outbreak of Corona Virus.

Lol that takes me right back to the first boilies I ever rolled, monster crab stinking up the gaff and it totally wiped out my sense of smell for ages.

My missus moans about the liver boilies i make now lol, might have to do some mc 1s and give her something to moan about

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I'm ok to cook hemp smells like Ovilteen, anything else would cause problems. to be fair she is fully into me going fishing always has been not a big fan of the whole carp angling cult, the Korda boys come in for some serious critique, she often wonders if they carry hair gel in their kit and is the camo really needed, John Wilson never wore camo and he was a hairdresser.  

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On 29 March 2020 at 23:19, harpz_31 said:

Lol that takes me right back to the first boilies I ever rolled, monster crab stinking up the gaff and it totally wiped out my sense of smell for ages.

My missus moans about the liver boilies i make now lol, might have to do some mc 1s and give her something to moan about

 

On 30 March 2020 at 08:29, framey said:

My mrs was ok with almost any bait I rolled except lobster thermadore lol

My Mrs moaned at me summat terrible when I made some Trigga with Liver Elite. She reckoned the smell was so bad it woker her up at 1am in the middle of the night.

 

That is the main reason since then I have mostly bought my bait ready made, although I do still make the occasional batch.

Garlic and Spice is not too bad, but Monster Crab would have got me killed...😖

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1 hour ago, Carpbell_ll said:

Got to be a few out tonight never has an early April evening been more carpy than tonight, at least that's how it feel to me. 

Every evening lately, soon as lockdown over, it will feel wintery again 😭😭

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I remember buying a bait years ago, it was one of those mix it yerself jobs called  'Black Magic" you mixed it up to a paste and then had to knead it like a dough for 10 minutes and you got a sinking bait that skinned off if you left it..... 2 days.....   2 BLEEDIN DAY'S I kneaded that flippin paste... would it sink... would it beggary... went in the bin so it did... tried making a few baits over the years gave it up as a bad job... my young apprentice is giving it a go as I type... good luck to him...

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